Committing to better health

My last post talked about my recent epiphany about commitment, specifically my lack of it with regards to smallholding. Realising I was coasting with one foot in our life here was disappointing; I always thought I was braver than that. Sadly, as I expanded my reflection I saw this lack of commitment in almost every area of my life, most notably my physical strength.

In the New Year I realised smallholding tasks were difficult and tiring; my muscular strength is waning due to years of inactivity. I've been saying for years that one day I would go back to weight-training to lose weight and help my bones stay strong as I age. I have accumulated a nice set of DVDs and cheap equipment from charity shops to work out at home but after one or two sessions I've fallen by the wayside, or triggered a pain response in a muscle or joint so stopped. 

I realised that despite saying one day I would sort it out, I wasn't doing anything and the years were passing by. I remember saying to myself I would do it in time for my 40th birthday. I'm now 46. It occurred to me that while I spend a lot of time poring over investing information for my financial future, I couldn't even find a few hours a week to invest in my health future, yet if I develop a long-term illness it could have a devastating impact on our finances. 

I realised that nothing would change unless I got seriously committed to the task and tried something different. What I was doing over and over again wasn't working. Insanity is repeating the same mistakes and expecting different results. So, the first thing I did was admit I was fooling myself if I thought I would work out properly at home. Some people can, but clearly I'm not one of them (as evidenced by the dust bunnies accumulating on my exercise equipment). I decided not to lie to myself anymore and get to the gym. Back at uni I had a great routine down - I would run and weight train three times a week on alternate days and rest on Sundays. I enjoyed the discipline of going to the gym, the wide range of equipment, and the challenge of finding ways to incrementally improve myself. I had also paid my subs for the month and was going to get maximum use out of them!

The gym I now wanted to join was quite cheap at £17 a month, with a huge range of equipment and a separate ladies gym, plus trainers on hand offering free advice. Great stuff and it was a short drive away. And that's when I realised there was another issue to address first.

I passed my driving test in 2016, nearly 10 years after I first started, and since that day I haven't driven. I have walked into town, despite taking nearly 50 minutes, and called it 'exercise' or if too far got a cheap taxi. I have actually used public transport to get into the office, a journey that could take up to four hours first thing in the morning, rather than drive 1hr 40 mins. That's fear for you. If I needed to do something I would find a way other than driving. My fear was verging on phobia.

But this time I couldn't escape from it. The gym was too far to walk, there was no public transport and the trips would be too frequent so taxis would be expensive. I refused to be dishonest enough to persuade a nearby friend or neighbour to go with me just to snaffle free trips in their car (yes, my frightened brain even came up with that one). This was a defining moment. I knew deep down the option of 'committing' to exercising at home would not work so that had to be discounted; that was letting fear rule and besides, if that was going to work it would have worked a long time ago. I was past that now; no point going backwards. I had reached Robert's Frost "two paths diverged in a wood" and one of two things had to happen: I had to drive to the gym or stop being dishonest and give up on the idea of exercising and slob out, take my chances in the health lottery of life without doing anything to put the odds in my favour. The fact that the latter made me feel dreadful showed me the path I needed to take. I decided to commit to getting to the gym by car. 

I booked refresher driving lessons with an instructor that was noted for being good with nervous drivers. After two lessons he told me I was a good driver and didn't want to take  any more of my money from me. The only way I was going to conquer the fear and develop confidence was to get out there and drive. He's a smart cookie and I knew he was right.

My finger marks are probably still on the steering wheel from that first journey on my own three weeks ago; I gripped it so tight my knuckles were white and I talked out loud to myself all the way, but I got to a garden centre and back safely, a journey of 30 minutes. From then on I took it slowly, one trip to do one task and then home. I found the pet shop, the supermarket, the bank, DIY store, my GP, the town library and finally the gym, which I joined. There was a discount for annual membership and, knowing getting my monies worth would keep me going, I paid up front. It worked out at £12.50 a month. I started last week and have thoroughly enjoyed the three sessions so far.

I'm now committed to visiting the gym three times a week for the next 12 months. A trainer has devised a strength-training programme for me, and will check in with me once a week to make sure I'm doing what I have committed to, tweaking the programme as I get stronger. 

I should have done this many years ago I know, but as the old Chinese proverb says:

When is the best time to plant a fruit tree? Twenty years ago. 
When is the second best time to plant a fruit tree? Today.